You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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