I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I need to calm my uterus...
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize