nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize