So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
This gyro tastes like lonliness
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't notice because vodka
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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