I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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