Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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