I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
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Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
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This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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