he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize