idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
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i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
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I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
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