I can text with my tongue
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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