Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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