My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize