He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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