As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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