dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize