I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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