I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
๐๐๐ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
So what if is hockey, you donโt turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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