i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Semen is not good for contacts.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
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