Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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