Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
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I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
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I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize