Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
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