The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
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I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
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