The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Randomize