covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
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