flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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