I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize