if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
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