Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
These tits shall not be calmed
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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