somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize