I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize