there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Randomize