Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
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I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
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I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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