It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
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i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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