are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
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as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
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I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
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