Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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