i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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