i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
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