Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
It's never too late to be topless.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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