That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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