Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize