I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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