In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize