he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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