and next time when you feel me up, do it right
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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