soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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