i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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