i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize