I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
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