Whatcha textin bout Willis?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize