Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
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he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
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Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
This is my gift to your gina
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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